Adversity

It's been a while, huh? Well, there have been some developments in my household that have kept me away. For those of you who don't know, my husband lost his job in January, a loss that has repercussions I don't care to discuss at this moment. Then, in March, we found out that one of his sisters had been brutally murdered. I don't have to tell you that it's been a trying, shocking time on the old home front. 

As difficult as it is to keep the faith right now, we are not alone and, sadly enough, still better off than many. You see, we are one of an exorbitant number of families facing unexpected challenges right now. People do it every day. I would venture a guess that not a second goes by without someone, somewhere, receiving life-altering news. Adversity does not spare any of us. And, as we've recently realized, it doesn't wait until we've recovered from its last jab to hit us with its powerful right hook.

Recently, a man for whom I have a great deal of respect told us that "adversity is a liberator." That really hit home with me. You see, when my husband lost his job, it immediately became clear to me that, other than the psychological effects that losing his livelihood would have on him, we hadn't really lost anything - nothing irreplaceable, anyway. For the first time in a long time, I started to think in terms of how much we really do have when you strip away all the stuff. Don't get me wrong - I love my house, the club, all the perks that our hard work has brought us. And anyone who knows me knows that I will never be one of those people who sells all of her stuff, buys a tent and moves into the woods with her family. I am not now, nor have I ever been, a minimalist in that sense. And yet, with my family by my side and my God at my back, I will walk away from all of it, without looking back, if I have to.

What I realized was that the adversity at this point of our life has freed me to let go of the things that aren't necessary. It has freed me to find out that, as India Arie says, "I am not my hair" (substitute hair for house, car, whatever I've been clinging to). I am not these things, my satisfaction does not come from my bank account or my social standing. It has freed me to make some decisions - to stop putting off the things I believe I was called to do, the things I believe I am required to do, without the clutter of trying to hold on to things that are temporary and replaceable. It has freed me to focus on what matters most - my family and faithful friends, being present in every moment with them, our health. It has freed me to really appreciate the amazing man I married, to develop a new level of respect for all that he has done and is willing to do to take care of, provide for and cherish his family. I have always respected and loved him, but now, I truly realize how blessed I am to be by his side in good times and bad.

Adversity has, strangely enough, alleviated some of the fear I never knew I lived with. The unknown - what would we do if - no longer is a hypothetical. It becomes "what's the next step in this adventure we're on?" It becomes, "How did I not know how amazing these people I call family and friends are?" It becomes, "No matter what happens, we can get through it with faith and a firm commitment to what matters most." 

I don't know what the reasons are or God's plans to use these challenges. What I do believe, with every fiber of my being, is that He will use them, is using them, for our good and the good of His kingdom. What I hold on to is that Adversity, when it liberates us to do all the things we now must do, becomes Hope - hope for something new, something better.

Hope is There

Hope is there when the storm is raging.

Hope is there when you've lost it all.

Hope is there when the darkness falls.

Have no fear, hope is there.

Hope is there when your world is crumbling.

Hope is there when the pain abounds.

Hope is there, even in destruction,

even in despair, hope is there.

Hope is there for us to lean on.

It will guide us through it all.

And when the suffering's more than you can bear,

say a prayer, hope is there.

Hope is there when the battle's over,

Hope is there when you've lost the fight.

Hope is there when the tears are flowing.

Hope is there, hope is there.

Hope is there for us to lean on.

It will guide us through it all.

And when the suffering's more than you can bear,

say a prayer, hope is there.

Say a prayer, hope is there.

Just say a prayer, hope is there.

Hope is there.

Happy New Year

I wanted to write this yesterday, on the first day of the new year, but, as is often the case, life does not wait upon our whims and mine kept going on, as if it didn't know that it was a holiday. So, I write my New Year's message on the second day of the year. That's better than doing it in July, right? 

I hope everyone reading this is as excited as I am about the new year. Things are not going the way many of us would like them to, but, as a friend of mine said on New Year's Eve, that's all the more reason to celebrate, to ring in the new year - we had to put an end to the last year to arrive at the hope and promise of a new one. Still, in the spirit of saying a fond farewell to 2008, I will focus on some amazing things that have touched my life in the last 12 months (this list is not in any particular order and definitely is not all-inclusive):

• My family is loving, healthy, resilient and intact.
• We are still okay financially - great jobs, roof over our heads, food in our bellies, etc.
• My dear, dear friend completed chemotherapy and has taken steps to live life to its fullest.
• I am blessed with the most amazing family and group of wonderful friends (some new and some tried and true) that I could ever ask for.

Last, but certainly not the least of my blessings from 2008, is the realization that last year's leg of my journey brought me - that I am, always have been, and always will be involved in the most amazing love affair of all time - my Savior's love affair with me. While I don't do New Year's resolutions (I set short-, mid- and long term goals for myself in the new year), I resolve this year to actively explore my part in this love affair, to do what I can to uphold my end of this relationship and give back to God - not what He gives me, because that is not possible, but to give what He created me to give, to work on being whom He created me to be, to focus on loving, worshipping, praising and glorifying Him the way He uniquely equipped me to love, worship, praise and glorify Him.

I wish you a blessed and prosperous 2009 and thank you for having joined me on the journey through 2008.

He wraps me in protection, 

in security, in love,

strong hands that bring such comfort 

to my soul.

This world and its distractions 

melt away beneath His touch.

In wonder, I let go of 

all control.

I'm letting go completely 

of myself, of all but Him

to let His love, His goodness 

fill me up.

I revel in His power, 

in His strength and all He gives,

and when I thirst, He's there to 

fill my cup.

I seek Him with a hunger 

that will never go away,

a need to feel His presence 

in my life.

I'm nourished by His nectar, 

by His faithful, holy grace,

completed when I'm walking 

in His light.

I love Him, I adore Him, 

my beginning and my end,

the Rock that keeps me steady 

in His way.

I live to give Him glory, 

to put a smile upon His face,

my purpose is to please Him 

night and day.